Lost Soul
by dobrevsdream
Summary: When Oliver finally receives the call that Felicity has woken from her three month coma, he speeds to the hospital only to receive tragic news. Post 4x09


Author's note: It's been a while since I wrote for Olicity but I felt inspired by the mid-season finale! Happy reading!

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Oliver Queen gripped the steering wheel of his car tightly, his knuckles turning white as he flew through the intersection towards the hospital. Several cars sounded their horns as he whizzed past, driving way past the speed limit. Ignoring them, he refused to remove his foot off the accelerator as he tried to make it to the hospital as soon as possible, however despite the speed he was driving at – he couldn't get there fast enough.

Time.

The night of the attack, he learned that time indeed was an illusion. The night Felicity was shot had transpired to be one of the longest, worst nights of his entire life, and he had been through a great deal. Two minutes had felt like two hours and an hour had stretched into a day whilst he had waited for news in the cramped A&E room.

Time.

That horrific night, time seemed to stretch out endlessly whilst he had internally prepared himself for the inevitable news that the woman he loved more than life itself had died. Hours passed, patients had come and gone whilst Oliver had paced the corridors with his hands behind his head. He had felt wired, despite the exhaustion – he had never been more awake in his entire life. The jacket of his bloodstained tuxedo had been discarded on one of the uncomfortable waiting room chairs and the top button of his shirt had been loosened whilst he prayed for her recovery. That night, for the first time in a very long time, he had _prayed_. He had prayed for the good news that never came and by the third day, Diggle had forcibly convinced him to go home for a shower and a change of clothing. Soon after, days had turned into weeks and weeks into months and with it came the realization that the likelihood of Felicity never opening eyes again grew greater with every passing day. Time passed swiftly then, and her absence became a gaping hole in his life, his sadness becoming anger, which turned into rage and lastly, guilt.

 _"I chose this life, I chose you."_

Those were the words which had stayed with him, haunting him every night as he prayed for sleep. That had been what she had told him, however he knew the truth. He had been the reason she had to make such a choice in the first place – he had been the one who had dragged her into his insane life. Diggle had warned him of the dangers that would come with bringing her into the fold, yet he had foolishly believed that he would be able to protect her. He had been drawn to her, yes - however it had been her intellect, her humor, swift wit and her skills which had compelled him to tell her the truth. He had never expected to fall in love with her, never had fathomed the possibility that he would wind up engaged to the little blonde firecracker. Even at the brink of losing her, he was unable to regret bringing her into the group because that would require regretting meeting her and falling in love with her which he was unable to do. No matter what, she was easily the best thing that had happened to him. He allowed all of these thoughts to whirl through his mind as he drove frantically to the hospital, his heart slamming ferociously against his ribcage. Two-thousand one hundred and ninety hours he had prayed for this phone call, and as three months had passed by, a part of him had begun believing the unfathomable - that he would never see her blue eyes sparkle again. Until _today_ when the call came.

As he finally pulled up to the hospital, he ditched his car at the main entrance and jumped out, ignoring everyone's protests as he dashed dazedly through reception. He would worry about receiving a ticket or a point off his licence later for blocking the road – for now, his only concern was in Room Three. He walked through the corridor absent minded, bumping into several shoulders whilst his feet instinctively took him to the place which had practically become his second home.

Once he entered her ward, all the nurses, recognizing him rushed forwards and congratulated him. He thanked them, his mind vacant and their excited chatter falling on deaf ears. There was one person consuming his every thought. _Felicity_. He heard words such as _'miracle'_ and _'astonishing'_ and he knew that they too had begun to believe that she'd never wake up. It wasn't until he was outside the room that he paused, his breathing shallow and his body on edge, every fiber in his body on alert. He could barely believe that she was one door away, and awake. Releasing a breath of relief, he burst through the door and stepped into the room, unable to hold off the anticipation of seeing her any longer. Her mother, Donna, who had been in the middle of fixing Felicity's blonde hair, turned to him, teary eyed and an unreadable expression on her features. His gaze fell past her, to Felicity, and he was unable to stop the deep jovial laugh which erupted from his mouth as he watched her. She was a sight for sore eyes – several months into a coma and she was still easily the most beautiful woman he had laid eyes upon. Her small frame which had previously been intubated and attached to several tubes and machines was now in a semi-erect position. The eyes he had grown used to seeing closed were now wide open, and searching his face wildly.

He took two long strides and closed the distance between them, sitting on the edge of her bed and beginning to pull her tiny frame towards his chest. He held her there for what felt like an eternity, breathing her in, ducking his head into her hair and closing his eyes in relief. He hadn't allowed himself to believe it until now, but she was _alive_.

"I thought I'd lost you," he whispered so that only she could hear.

Feeling her stir underneath him as she attempted to pull away from him, he drew back a fraction and searched her eyes which appeared vacant and confused.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he beaconed, stroking her cheek with his thumb.

"I – I'm," she croaked, struggling with the oxygen mask which covered her mouth.

Releasing her, her grabbed a glass of water from the table and helped her take a sip. She gulped down the water hungrily, turned to look at him a curious expression laced with fear on her features.

"Felicity?"

Licking her lips, tears sprung to her eyes which he instinctively moved to wipe away until she moved out of his reach.

"I – I don't know who you are!" she gasped out, cringing away from his touch and moving towards her mother.

With that one sentence, his entire life was blown into several pieces.

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 **Author's note** : Please leave me a review and let me know what you think and whether you want me to write this into a fully fledged fic. I initially wrote this with the intention of making it a one-shot, so do let me know. Thank you for reading and I truly hope you enjoyed it.


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